Since it was revealed, the crazy new Wii concept of Zombie Massacre has continued to draw bemused glances from gamers. At first, we were floored by the insanely ridiculous idea concerning nuclear warheads being driven into a zombie-infested city. Next came news that, prior to even a publisher being signed on, Uwe Boll had snapped up the movie license rights. Yes, Zombie Massacre is a weird one, but we like weird here at Destructoid. 

The game’s developer, 1988 Games, also seems to like us, and when producer Benjamin ‘Cowboy’ Krotin contacted us to explain exactly what on Earth possessed him to throw in his lot with The Raging Boll, we decided to wrestle him into a chair, shine a light in his eyes and make him tell us so much more.

Hit the jump for our very entertaining interview with the man behind what could be one of the most ludicrously brilliant Wii titles of all time.

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Fans of Destructoid will have gathered by now that I love a good, old fashioned action game. This is why I hated Rygar: The Legendary Adventure for the PlayStation 2. While some people seemed to like it, I couldn’t stand the bloody thing, mired as it was in sub-par gameplay and embarrassing cutscenes that weren’t even good in a "bad kung fu movie" way. 

Imagine my surprise — or rather, dismay — to see a trailer for a brand new Rygar game. Even more amazingly, it begins with crap voice acting and ends with gameplay that looks identical to that was released in 2002 — the bad gameplay! This is Rygar: Battle of Argus, and I cannot contain my … apathy.

Who knows? Maybe it’ll be good, but seeing this trailer has, for now, ruined my day. If anyone wants me, I’ll be out back, kicking a kitten to death to try and cheer myself up again. Oh, and why does it say muscle impact at the end? That’s … disturbing.

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Where do I even begin to describe the trailer for the unlockable Paradise Mode in Ghost Squad? I guess I can start with the fact that all your enemies are bikini clad women and that you are using Dolphin guns to kill them. Yes, the guns are in the shape of Dolphins and they spit out water bullets that make Dolphin noises. Or how about the fact that at 48 seconds into the video, you use a banana as a weapon. The guy jams a f*cking banana down the throat of a girl and kills her — WITH A BANANA! I think the best moment in the video has to be when you crotch punch one of the chicks right before body slamming her. There’s no point to punching her there but he did anyway! This game is now a must buy.

Oh, and if you really care for gameplay from the main game, just hit the jump for two new videos.  

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Filed under: Nintendo DS, PC, Sony PlayStation 2, Sony PlayStation 3, Sony PSP, Microsoft Xbox 360

The Iron Man video game has two strikes against it, by merit of being (1) a licensed product and (2) poised to be released alongside a movie. However, there are some benefits to the movie connection. Speaking to USA Today, Sega of America Senior Producer Mike McHale revealed that they had received the CG model for Iron Man himself created by Industrial Light & Magic for use in the film.

The game, according to McHale, will extend beyond the movie’s storyline and also include classic villains from the comics. Whether or not this game succumbs the fate of most licensed titles remains to be seen. Iron Man, the game, is set for release “just before the film arrives in theaters May 2.”

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Filed under: Microsoft Xbox 360

Former Joystiq writer Jared Rea (hi Jared!) sent us these pictures of him and girlfriend Shelby dressed up as splicers from BioShock. You can view more pictures at Shelby’s blog. Check out the highlights for this weekend:

Joystiquery
Japanese hardware sales, Oct. 15 - Oct. 21: Surprisingly boring edition
Joystiq Asks: What features should MS spring for the Fall Update?
Last Week in Warcraft: October 20th - October 27th
PS Fanboy Week in Review: 10/22 - 10/28
Reminder: Another Mario pumpkin that should win Castlevania: Dracula X Chronicles
Slash & Poison launch Guitar Hero III in Los Angeles
Today’s most Tron-in-reverse video: The Gamer trailer
Venture capital and online games @ Virtual Worlds Forum
Weekly Webcomic Wrapup: unexpected edition

News
Rock Band strat may not rock with Guitar Hero 3
The big games left for 2007
Scene It demo on Xbox Live
New games this week: Guitar Hero III edition
Build your own stages in Smash Bros. Brawl
Castlevania II, Samurai Ghost, Magician Lord scare up Wii VC
New York Times does ‘Manhunt 2 for Dummies’ recap
Rock Band drops full set list, minus bonus tracks
Simpsons writers say Rockstar ’spazzed’ over GTA spoof
Guitar Hero III gets offline mode with patch on 360
Eye of Judgment cards can be copied, played
Dead Space trailer the result of derelict vessels
This Wednesday: Mutant Storm Empire, er, storms onto XBLA
Lego Batman to include Man-Bat and … Nighthawk?
Epic president wanted to cut Gears’ multiplayer, Mad World ad
Katamari creator downplays importance of video games
Team Fortess 2’s Xbox Live update now available
Microsoft: IPTV not a part of Xbox Live Fall Update
Capcom, Sony to produce animated Resident Evil movie
Crysis shines gold, due out November 16

Rumors & Speculation
Rumor: 360’s IPTV features spotted in dashboard

Culture & Community
Consumer check: Make sure Wal-Mart’s Guitar Hero 3 bundle is one you want

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Filed under: Microsoft Xbox 360

So, we know those IPTV screens are “unrelated” to the Xbox 360’s Fall Update, but that’s about all we know about the last of this year’s major 360 updates. Last year’s Fall Update (was that really the first?) included 1080p support, HD DVD functionality, XNA functionality, WMV compatibility, and more. Some pretty big-ticket items in there, to be sure. And there’s been two Spring Updates (‘06 and ‘07), both of which came with some huge improvements including background downloading and chat and IM functionality.

Just two days before the one-year anniversary of the Fall Update, we’d like to ask you Joystiqers, what should we expect to see in this year’s Fall Update? We’ve heard rumors of DivX video support, an XBLA blade, and integrated clan functionality. Surely there’s more up the sleeve of Redmond’s oversized fall-themed sweater. Us? We’d love to be able to change the listed gamertag of ‘xXsmokezmadbluntz420Xx’ to the more frequently used title: ‘Mom’. And what do you, dear readers, want to see in your Fall Update? Vote up the comments you like best and we’ll compile the best answers later in the week.

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Filed under: Microsoft Xbox 360

Turns out those images of an Xbox 360 with IPTV were legit. In a statement issued by Microsoft, the Redmond-based company acknowledged that the IPTV features “were inadvertently exposed while the customer’s console was being serviced and is unrelated to the Fall Update.”

The IPTV features, according to the statement, are part of the Microsoft Mediaroom services and will be made available to service providers by the end of this year, adding that it will be up to them to decide when the service is deployed. We’ve posted Microsoft’s complete statement after the break.

Continue reading Microsoft: IPTV not a part of Xbox Live Fall Update

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Filed under: Microsoft Xbox 360, First Person Shooters, Online

You’ll forgive us for missing this tidbit of news this weekend, as we (along with some of you, no doubt) were much too enthralled by the other, other, other, other Game of the Year, this one nestled in Valve’s sumptuous Orange Box. If you wanted to add Team Fortress 2 to your list of yearly praise but felt that lag ruined the experience, perhaps the title update for the Xbox 360 version will do away with your doubts. The following technical alterations to the charming multiplayer romp should take effect the next time you load up the game whilst signed in to Xbox Live:

• Reduced network bandwidth usage in multiplayer.
• Improved overall game performance.
• Arranged search results to favor preferred host conditions.
• Improved searching for ranked games.
• Addressed a possible false report of too little storage space on larger hard drives (not this again!)

[Via press release

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Filed under: Microsoft Xbox 360, First Person Shooters, Online

You’ll forgive us for missing this tidbit of news this weekend, as we (along with some of you, no doubt) were much too enthralled by the other, other, other, other Game of the Year, this one nestled in Valve’s sumptuous Orange Box. If you wanted to add Team Fortress 2 to your list of yearly praise but felt that lag ruined the experience, perhaps the title update for the Xbox 360 version will do away with your doubts. The following technical alterations to the charming multiplayer romp should take effect the next time you load up the game whilst signed in to Xbox Live:

• Reduced network bandwidth usage in multiplayer.
• Improved overall game performance.
• Arranged search results to favor preferred host conditions.
• Improved searching for ranked games.
• Addressed a possible false report of too little storage space on larger hard drives (not this again!)

[Via press release

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Filed under: Culture, Sony PlayStation 3, Microsoft Xbox 360, Casual

Ever the eccentric, Katamari Damacy creator Keita Takahashi went on stage at a video game conference and tried to tell the audience that video games are NOT the most important thing in the world.

We couldn’t believe it either.

Standing barefoot in front of London Nottingham’s GameCity conference, the obviously brain-damaged Takahashi alleged that “it would be impossible for us to be here… if the world was not peaceful.” He tried to convince the crowd that real world suffering and problems were occasionally more pressing than games. “If you’re suffering from poverty and disease, could you worry about collecting coins? I don’t think so,” he argued, unconvincingly.

Takahashi also implied, rather laughably, that things like recycling and being friendly were just as important as beating Halo 3 on Legendary for the third time. “I’m not trying to be the next Al Gore but I’m not sure if we could afford to have video games in ten or twenty year’s time,” the fearmongering designer said, adding that white is black and up is actually down.

After the confusing opening, Takahashi showed off a demo of Nobi Nobi Boy, thankfully distracting the audience from the problems of the real world once again.

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