Hey, Smash Bros. Dojo? I need a word with you.
Though you represent one of the industry’s most brilliant marketing tactics I’ve ever seen, I must confess that I’m a wee bit irate with you. You’ve made my job difficult. I have to review this friggin’ game and the hype has hit critical mass.
As such, I expect upon publication of said review to either be beaten senseless with rocks and sticks, or tied to a tree and set on fire. Oh, not because I think the game is bad, mind — it just comes with the territory when buzz hits a certain mark. So if you could, tell my family I said I’m sorry, and pat Anthony Burch on the ass and tell him I said "thanks for the good times". It’s the least you can do, seeing as how you’ve led me to a meager, pathetic, and early death.
Yeah. Thanks a friggin‘ lot. Hit the jump for my review of the Wii’s biggest, most monolithic offering yet — but be forewarned, the review, like the game, is a bit dense.
[This review may contain the occasional mention of secret characters, stages or other unlockables that may infuriate the spoiler-sensitive.]
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